When one is in distress, the decent person naturally wishes to give aid and/or shelter to the suffering. It is right and just to do so, especially when doing so allows the one in need stable ground on which to collect themselves and strive on through their tribulations.
The frustration arrives when it becomes obvious to the decent man, that the individual in distress does not actually want or care to steady themselves for a long road of betterment ahead, but simply wishes to take advantage of the kind gesture to remain in a pitiable state of helplessness forever, because they have learned that by doing so they can get decent people to show them kindness.
Once the decent realise that they are being exploited, it takes a great deal of patience - and sternness - to impart on the guest they have generously sheltered that they have an obligation to themselves and to their host to resolve their turmoil as best they can and do whatever is in their power to improve themselves. Most people don’t have that patience - especially not now with our instant gratification, do-it-all-now societal expectations - so instead they get very frustrated and lash out.
Even if someone has to spend a lifetime living in my house, I can still accept it readily with grace as long as I know they are contributing to it’s upkeep - even if just by doing the dirty jobs I don’t feel like doing - and striving to gain an independent income of their own (even if they aren’t successful in actually solidifying one for a long time). But someone sitting on the couch all day doing nothing is insufferable.
Those who languish in learned helplessness and victimhood complexes have a large part to play in the gradual fading of generosity and charity in our society, and the cooling of hearts in the face of human suffering - a change which can bring ONLY misery and pain to our lives and civilisation as a whole. It may seem like an overly grand concept to talk about in the face of…how did you put it? “Someone is misbehaving, crying and being dramatic” on the booru forums. But it is a microcosm of the overall problem.
What I have learned from this conversation, is that you and Hollowfox both represent a very dire problem of moral stagnation and degeneracy, both by representing of the opposing ends of the feedback loop of the Death of Charity and Compassion, with other users involved in the conversation representing the wide gradient of levels of frustration from Decent People who want to give help, but find that the one crying out for it does not in truth, want the aid they provide.