I am Ponyville’s best hairstylist! Oh please; you don’t even brush your own hair.  
Exactly! My manestyles last forever if you do nothing to preserve them!  
No brushing, prepping, washing, or waxing required. You’re paid to make manestyles bad?  
Yes, and instantly. Now I don’t have to worry about my manestyle for weeks.  
I can throw shampoo into my hair and hope for the best. If I muss up my mane I just get a new manestyle.  
But your mane looks horrid. And beauty is in the eye of the beholder!  
Well… I guess as long as you don’t go to any formal events like that. I want to go to formal events like that.  
Can you imagine if every pony sees my example and puts in effort to make their manestyles look effortless?  
Do it! DO IT! The best part is that they can’t say anything about it. Come forth, Dashie!  
We must make a messy mane! On it How’s that? Not what I had in mind, but it’s close enough.