“What? Oh, yeah… so if you wanna know why I’m here and why I look like this, it’s a pretty weird story, actually… so anyway, uh… I used to be just this regular dude just a few months ago, believe it or not… one day I stopped by here to grab a burger and fries… next day, I started craving the same thing again, so I stopped by again… I ate here every day all week, once a day… next week, twice a day… finally I’m up to three times a day, I just can’t get enough, y’know? My body just starts to NEED it, I guess, dunno what the deal was… and on top of that, uh… just a few days after I first grabbed a bite here, my body starts CHANGING, I guess…? It’s like… I get a lot shorter, I grow a unicorn horn and a tail, I turn into a girl… it’s almost like all the stuff I’m eating here is fueling everything, but I just can’t help it, I can’t stop eating here, I just crave it so bad… then, even worse… my ass and especially my boobs start getting WAY bigger from all the calories I guess… even though I still got a pretty thin waist? All the fat just goes STRAIGHT to my ass and tits. I dunno… so now I gotta wear like this super-huge, like, reinforced custom Q cup bra, but it pulls ‘em up into this big ol’ heavy shelf that sticks out WAY too far and keeps getting in my way and banging into stuff, plus these straps are MURDER on my shoulders and my poor back… but yeah, anyway, I just kept coming here so much that the manager (he’s SUPER smart, y’know he used to be some kinda biotech researcher or somethin’ before he started working here…?) finally just offered me a job and a discount on all my meals here… What? The manager? … Yeah, we’re seeing each other right now, but keep what you saw on the DL, ok? This frickin’ body keeps getting so damn horny all the time, it really helps havin’ a guy like him around to help relieve some of the pressure… he’s REALLY great at milking me too, it builds up real quick especially after I eat and it just aches and aches until he… did I just say all of that out loud?? Sorry, ever since these changes started it’s just been getting harder and harder for me to think straight… anyway, strangest thing… I found out yesterday the manager was, like, SUPER into images of pony girls with mega-huge tits WAY before we ever even met… weird coincidence, eh…?”