Rainbow Dash was never good with loss. Even way back when Tank hibernated for the first time, when it was just a temporary loss, she dealt with it in all the wrong ways. All the denial and bargaining did nothing but make her more miserable, until she was finally able to accept it.
 
But losing her daughter, that was something she could not come to terms with.
 
Again, she wasn’t coping well, but it was worse than anything she had gone through before. She was so overcome with grief that it caused her to cut off a once-close friend, to grow cold towards her grandchildren and even become more distant from her husband and remaining children. Loss had changed her for the worse.
 
All she did was try to numb herself from the ache. After the funeral, after her son’s coma, she hardly ever brought it up. She avoided anything that might remind her of her daughter and what happened, even when it involved sacrificing relationships she once held dear. It was better this way, she reasoned, because at least she didn’t have to feel anything.
 
But as much as she tried, Rainbow couldn’t deny that she was lonely. The dull ache never went away, but instead slowly grew stronger the more she distanced herself from everypony. Her friends couldn’t help her…in fact, they often did the opposite. Her sons eventually stopped trying and moved on with their lives, realizing that there was nothing they could do for her. Soarin’ was the only one who never gave up on her…while he was alive. Now she was alone with nothing but an empty house and faded memories.
 
And…a letter.
 
She didn’t even know it was there until she’d opened her door and found an envelope on the steps. She wasn’t sure how long it had been sitting there, but it seemed to be in good shape…like it had been barely touched at all. But most important was the name on the back. “For Mom” in Paint’s handwriting. A letter, just for her, that hadn’t been read by anyone else.
 
…Was she ready to read it?
 
Rainbow knew it would be painful. She didn’t want to think about what happened or dig up all the feelings she’d pushed down for so many years. But deep inside, she knew she had to. At the very least, for Paint.
 
She slowly, hesitantly tore open the envelope and began reading:
 
“Mom,
 
Now that you’re reading this, I have passed away. As a mother myself, I can only imagine how you’re feeling right now. I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I lost any of my dear foals…which is why I chose their lives over mine. But I want you to know it was my choice, Mom. Roy had no part in my decision to do this, so please, please don’t blame him. I want you to be there for him after I’m gone, and our children too. Dad, Lightning, Firework…hold them close, because they’re probably feeling the same way. Let your friends be there for you like they always have been, because I know how important they are to you. I know you’re probably still grieving, but hold on to the family and friends you still have, Mom. Not just for me, but for your sake too. Stay loyal to those you love.”
 
Rainbow stopped there, body suddenly wracked with sobs as tears welled up in her long-dried eyes. It had been so long since she’d felt this way—felt anything, really—but now it was all coming back to her. Forcefully, painfully, but not without the sweet tenderness that her daughter was always known for. It was almost like Paint was in the room with her, even as she cried bitterly in the darkness.
 
What kind of Element of Loyalty was she? Abandoning everypony Paint told her to hold on to? Placing blame where there was none? What kind of mother was she, forgetting everything her daughter stood for and letting her other two children, and her grandchildren, suffer for it? What kind of friend was she, pushing all her closest friends away? Rainbow couldn’t help but be overcome with crippling regret.
 
But she was also filled with a new determination. Paint wanted her to hold her family and friends close. And while she’d failed at that, that didn’t mean she couldn’t start now. Hopefully. At the very least, she had to try to make amends. For herself and for Paint.
 
And she would start with a certain friend she’d wronged.