Page 116 - The Masquerade

Guest author: Xuincherguixe

“I’m under no illusion that I’m doing anything but channeling myself into Sweetieplayer. In my defense, I think it’s ended up pretty funny.”

So apparently, if you throw a Vampire: the Masquerade [dead link] player at the Equestria setting, you’re likely to get Sweetie Bot (a la Friendship is Witchcraft [dead link]). Good to know.

Rarity: So here’s the guy I was telling you about.
DM: The one who plays the Malkavian?
Fluttershy: Malkavian?
Sweetie Belle: It’d take too long to explain. Best way to look at it is that he’s Rodney Dangerfield. Gets no respect and drinks the blood of anyone who gets in his way. Here’s my sheet for this game.
Applejack: I think I’m even more confused now.
Rarity: He’ll do that to you. He is a good player though. Last week he convinced the prince of New York to spare our unlives. By making him go insane.
Twilight Sparkle: Am I reading this right? Sweetie Belle, Robot Unicorn? ROBOT?!
{Beat}
DM: Who’s a wizard no less.
Rainbow Dash: That’s the coolest thing I’ve ever heard.
Twilight Sparkle: There must be some kind of mistake. This is a fantasy setting.
Sweetie Belle: I know. That’s why she’s a wizard. And not an attorney.
DM: Wait. It says no one knows you’re a robot?
Sweetie Belle: It’s a very good disguise!
DM: But it says here you’re Rarity’s sister. I think your parents would know what with… y’know, not being born and all.
Sweetie Belle: …If I know this group better, I could come up with something utterly wrong to solve that. So I’m just going to go with ‘a spell was cast to alter their memory.’
DM: But you can’t cast that at level 1.
Sweetie Belle: A fellow robot agent could!
Twilight Sparkle: Robots can’t be wizards!
Sweetie Belle: That attitude is precisely the reason why the robot apocalypse is inevitable.