Video game thread

ANoobis
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Ghibelline Omnipotens
I miss the days when humans were the Forerunners, and there wasn’t a conga line of ever ancienter and more god-like aliens popping up trying to out ham each other. We’ll probably see the Precursors return in Halo 7. We’ll really be in for it then.
FeatherTrap
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Chatty Kirin - A user who has reached a combined 1000 forum posts or comments.
A toast - Incredibly based
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Liberty Belle - Sings the song of the unchained

Knight of Boops
@ANoobis  
Not only are they all trying to outdo each other, but they all keep babbling on about nonsense and using that as a justification to be bad guys. Picking a fight that the UNSC and humanity clearly doesn’t give a shit about, since you don’t hear any human factions in Halo going on about “MUH RECLAMATION!” XP
 
Bungie Halo had such a simple and straightforward premise for the opposing force: They believed the Forerunners to be their gods, and wish to fire the Halos as they believe it was how their gods ascended into a spiritual, divine existence. A “Great Journey” if you will, into the Divine Beyond.
 
But since Forerunner tech is genetically locked to humans (since they are the genetic ancestors of humanity (in the old, good lore anyway)), they undermine the prophet’s base of power and the underlying tenants of the Covenant religion. So the prophets declare humanity to be abominations and begin a genocidal war against them and tightly control all information regarding their connection to the Forerunners.
 
But ever since 343 took over, all the opposing forces they’ve introduced have the most contrived bullshit reasons for being villains:
 
  • Didact was retconned from being a heroic commander who tragically failed to save his lover and doom his civilisation in the process into being SPESS HITLER who wants to turn humanity into beep boops before they reclaim “muh mantle”, which they don’t care about. So really, he doesn’t have to do anything.
     
  • Cortana becomes one with the force Matrix and develops a god complex out of nowhere, despite the fact that she’s supposed to be cured of rampancy. After retconning her into being evil, she decides to take control of the Reapers Guardians who have been retconned into giant space parakeets and convinces all the other beep boops to be evil and take over the galaxy, just because she’s evil now.
     
  • The Banished literally have no reason to hate humanity whatsoever. Both have been at war with Covenant for a long time, and since they went full atheist-commie, they don’t care about any of that Forerunner crap either. They’re just the bad guys because 343 didn’t want to do anything interesting with the Covenant remnants and was sick of people complaining about the Prometheans.
     
  • The Endless…bluuuuh, what even are they? The only thing we know about them is that the Forerunners didn’t like them and did a stupid (since that’s all the new!lore forerunners do, stupids) and that they’re returning and plan to “ascend”, whatever that means. Again, the UNSC doesn’t care about this.
EverfreeEmergencies
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Fried Chicken - Attended an april fools event
Liberty Belle - Sings the song of the unchained

Amateur-er Autist
@FeatherTrap  
I still want to know how the fuck the Banished made it to the Ark. It’s far, far outside the galaxy, as shown in Halo 3, and to my knowledge the only way to make it there is through the slipspace portal on Earth. Nevermind that the Ark is supposed to have been destroyed anyhow.
FeatherTrap
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Chatty Kirin - A user who has reached a combined 1000 forum posts or comments.
A toast - Incredibly based
Artist -
Liberty Belle - Sings the song of the unchained

Knight of Boops
@EverfreeEmergencies  
Because plot. You might have noticed that everything about the Banished is horribly contrived in order to make them the nihilistic, commie covies.
 
It’s really a damn shame, because in theory the Banished could have actually been a really interesting faction. The idea of a Brute Chieftain who is a strategic genius could have actually been a very unique villain for Halo. Atroix could have been a brute who was actually not very strong for one of his kind, but was remarkably intelligent and had a mind for subversive strategy. He could have gained his following simply by being very persuasive and hard hitting with his logic, and was able to undermine faith in the Covenant among the weakest willed, and those most exposed to the Forerunner-Human connection.
 
He would have been the leader of quite a small heresy at the time, biding his time and surviving the might of the Covenant only by scavenging and hiding. Most of their new vehicles would have been of his design, and made out of whatever materials they could get their hands on while on the run. Then, after the collapse of the Covenant, he opportunistically took advantage of the chaos and mass-disillusionment to rally many of the disparate remnant factions to his banner.
 
But no, instead he’s just a boring “durr me smash things” Brute who acts really stupidly despite all the writers insisting he’s supposed to be smart. His only remarkable features are his dreadnaught-ship class layers of Plot Armour, and the trademark Mary Sue Aura of Retardation that makes everyone in their vicinity remarkably incompetent, regardless of prior ability, intelligence or skill.
FeatherTrap
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Chatty Kirin - A user who has reached a combined 1000 forum posts or comments.
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Liberty Belle - Sings the song of the unchained

Knight of Boops
@Barhandar  
Well yes, that.
 
 
@ANoobis  
You would be wrong, but if your impression is based off that video I shared then you would be forgiven for making that mistake.  
What’s actually happening is that 343’s writer’s pet is in the room, and so Chief’s arms now need to atrophy into wet noodles and he needs to be completely retarded as well, loosing all knowledge and ability to fight as we know he can from prior works. Because if the fight went as we all know it would from prior Bungie lore and the established rules of the universe were in full effect, Atriox would have been fucking dead before we even got a chance to assume control of the Chief in gameplay.
 
 
It’s a shame, there are places one could go with the Halo universe with a creative, skilled and passionate team of writers and programmers. But alas, in today’s Divisive-sorry “Diverse”-culture, mediocre drones who are loyal to the leftist cultural narrative and spread THE MESSAGE is rewarded, not actual passion, talent or creative drive. So really, I just wish Halo would die now, and the last thing to happen before the plug is pulled is that everything 343 made or had influence on is completely decanonised.
ANoobis
A toast - Incredibly based
Fried Chicken - Attended an april fools event
Book Horse - A user who has contributed to 5k+ metadata changes.
Chatty Kirin - A user who has reached a combined 1000 forum posts or comments.
Liberty Belle - Sings the song of the unchained

Ghibelline Omnipotens
Konami is going to be selling NFTs to mark Castlevania’s 35th anniversary. No games are announced, and fans are angry.
Azure Fang
Fried Chicken - Attended an april fools event
Liberty Belle - Sings the song of the unchained

Oh no, he's here?
@ANoobis  
So, in the AAA sphere we have confirmations on SquareEnix, Ubisoft, and Konami. Wonder how long it’ll be before Activision, Blizzard, and EA jump on that bandwagon.
Officer Hotpants
Rabid Squirrel - Don't pet it.
A toast - Incredibly based
Officer Shid pants - Hi, Im a lil shid.
Chatty Kirin - A user who has reached a combined 1000 forum posts or comments.
Liberty Belle - Sings the song of the unchained

Moderator
Double-0 Negative
I just woke up from a dream about a dream about a DMC reboot so bad that it could actually be real. And that wasn’t a typo. I dreamed that I dreamed something.
 
@FeatherTrap  
You know how we pretend paper is gold? NFTs are pretending a digital image is a piece of paper pretending to be gold. Except it’s even dumber because at least that piece of paper can’t be instantly invalidated in the event that a server goes offline.
Officer Hotpants
Rabid Squirrel - Don't pet it.
A toast - Incredibly based
Officer Shid pants - Hi, Im a lil shid.
Chatty Kirin - A user who has reached a combined 1000 forum posts or comments.
Liberty Belle - Sings the song of the unchained

Moderator
Double-0 Negative
@FeatherTrap  
Yes and no. “No” in that you’re technically getting what you bought, “yes” in that they’re (literally) banking on you being dumb enough to think it’s more than it is.
ANoobis
A toast - Incredibly based
Fried Chicken - Attended an april fools event
Book Horse - A user who has contributed to 5k+ metadata changes.
Chatty Kirin - A user who has reached a combined 1000 forum posts or comments.
Liberty Belle - Sings the song of the unchained

Ghibelline Omnipotens
@FeatherTrap  
NFT stands for non-fungible token. The thing you’re actually buying is the ‘token’, which is an entry on the blockchain. You can think of it like a receipt or a deed that exists only on the blockchain. In theory, you could purchase physical goods, the go-to examples when people explain this being paintings or concert tickets, and the record of your ownership of that physical item exists on the blockchain.
 
In practice, NFTs only ever refer to crappy, mass-produced digital art variants that always seem to look like this:
 
full
 
full
 
full
 
The idea behind the scam is that, even though these pieces are easily downloadable, only the one that was sold on the blockchain is ‘real’, so only the buyer truly owns it. It’s a speculation vehicle, another one of those bubbles that’s supposed to expand in value infinitely forever, so the people spending thousands to millions on their silly monkey variants are expecting to make a profit by selling their sole real copy at a massive markup in the future.
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