I remember a pumpkin from many years ago when I was a kid. It was sitting by a lamp or something, I don’t remember, something warm. This pumpkin sat there for a while, days, weeks, until one day there was this sound like peeing. It caught everyone’s attention. The pumpkin let out liquid and collapsed in on itself. It’s still funny.
Also a brownie. There was a brownie in a wax paper bag from the mall. There used to be these huge buildings in New Jersey called malls. Teenagers went there to hang out and skateboard and get yelled at by adults. A skateboard is a piece of plywood I think (I’m not sure) with some black stuff on it that lets your shoes grip it, and it has two sets of wheels and you propel yourself along by kicking the ground with your feet, it’s fun, trust me. Hanging out is spending time with your friends physically in the same place. Friends are humans you enjoy spending time with. I have to explain this all to you kids who have no idea what the hell I’m talking about. Anyway, I got a brownie in a wax paper bag and brought it home. The next morning the bag was soaking wet. The brownie peed the bag somehow.
Here’s another one from this morning. I was throwing away some old peas that were getting slimy. They smelled like Juicy Fruit for some reason.
